Born Freeeee

I've been meaning to CHOP ALL MY HAIR OFF for a while now and I finally made the choice to just go ahead and do it already. I prepped the boys to let them know mommy wouldn't have long hair anymore and Landon was happy with the idea and said, "Well when you look in the mirror, you will see you are pretty." I don't think he intended to make such a supportive, eloquent statement, but nonetheless it was a nice vote of confidence. 

And holy crap, y'all, life is a lot simpler right now. Can't find a hair tie? Psssh. Don't need it, yo! Is there enough time to dry my hair? Psssh. Umm, YEAH, I've got ONE MINUTE to spare. Feel guilty for using pricey shampoo? Eff no! 'Cause I only be using the size of a dime! Living in fear that my boys will scalp me while we are wrestling on the floor and errantly pull on long hair? Psssh! Climb on, boys! Momma will be fine! (Except please stop kicking me in the boobs.)

How long will it last, who knows. I suspect having to make an effort to get it trimmed regularly will wear on my laziness and sense of frugality well before any actual desire for reclaiming long hair surfaces. 

Fa La La La La La La La La

I have to give myself a pat on the back for a moment because I've been trying to keep the spirit of Christmas joy well in session despite Erik being away. I got on the ladder and hung some lights and cursed at availability of outdoor outlets, like most folks do. We didn't get a tree given our travel plans, but the boys have not asked about it at all - they are just so enamored with neighborhood light displays more than anything. 

We've been to the library to read with Santa, went to the senior center to have breakfast with Santa, went to the Christmas parade (to see Santa, again) and will attend the Winter Wonderland set up at the local campsites this weekend (I suspect Santa will be there, too). We had a cookie decorating party for friends and exchanged small gifts with friends and neighbors along the way. The boys repeatedly sing Jingle Bells. Well, you get the idea: Christmas is alive and well. [Except Landon is legitimately scared of our elf on the shelf, Cookie, this year. But I silently applaud him because, yes, can't we all admit the idea is slightly creepy?]

Cookie time included the lesser known Gingerbread Shark and Gingerbread Squirrel, among others.

Waking Up

"I'm dreaming, I'm dreaming, someone is poking me, someone is poking me. What the...?"

"I might punch you."

"Alright, just give me a moment."

"I'm listening."

"I'm pickin' up what you're puttin' down."

"Let's do this!"

Halloweenie Birthday 2014

Well this year I thought to myself that I could probably get away with just having a friend or two over for Landon's birthday. And I thought to myself I could probably get away with only trick or treating at a couple houses with the boys. So of course this means Landon ended up having a birthday party on Halloween evening and then the posse of 10 neighborhood friends and parents took to the streets for treats. Funny how that happens. Regardless of the original plan, it was a super fun time and I'm glad we decided to pull it off last minute.

Landon, you bring so many silly smiles and energy to our lives. Happy 4th Birthday, my little buddy! As your Grandma put it so eloquently, we could wrap up a box of turds and you'd still find joy in opening it and say, "Cool! Turds!" Lest you think that's an insult, I assure you it is a roundabout way of saying you're a pretty awesome little dude. As it stands, you enjoyed some new Lego sets and that's how you spend about 3 hours a day - doing Legos. Interspersed with iPad, jumping and running like a nutsy guy, Play doh and some puzzles. 

My current career prediction for you as of this year is an improv comedian. You practice your silly animated faces diligently in the mirror each day and you love a good slap stick joke. The next Jim Carrey, perhaps...?

Also: props to Anders for being the Cheeseburger to my Hot Dog. Where do I sign us up for Motherboy?

Happy 4th Birthday, Landon!

Let's see what I can come up with next year.

Working hard for the candy. I didn't get any pics of Landon trick or treating because he was in beast mode and sprinting around too fast :)

Singing happy birthday!

Love our cutie friends!

Parents having fun, too.

Spiderman is apparently looking for the next vertical surface to scale.

This is the year that rookie mom realizes we will not buy a costume that has a full mask for another 10 years.

Epic battle of superheroes.

Mummy dogs and pumpkin pizza was on the menu!

Grandma extraordinaire helping on the front lines. Thank you!!!!

Evening Sunsets

Just to be clear: I want to retire in Anacortes. 

On The Blue

The USS Carl Vinson relieved the USS George HW Bush this past week to take over operations in the Arabian Gulf area. They are naming their efforts in strikes in Iraq and Syria as Operation Inherent Resolve. 

If you are on Facebook, "liking" the official USS Carl Vinson page offers some great photos and regular updates from the Captain. I know some people shy away from social media, but I'm grateful for its updates along the way. Erik and I certainly email and stay in touch, but we talk about everyday things like the gross boat pizza or how many puddles the boys jumped in that day, not so much the heavy stuff. 

Two months down!

Hint for family: Every Growler jet number starts with a "5" (just like jet 500 above) ... so if you are looking at the Vinson's photos on the flight deck, look for a 5.

Erik says the nickname for the Gulf area is the "Milk Bowl" because its just a hazy white time in the sky.

Photo op for the Cougar officers.

It's Fall, Y'all

Keeping these boys busy in our favorite season! 

Courting his friend Vivian through some wildflowers.

You know it's going to be a long day when your children have to touch EVERY pumpkin at Hedlin Farms.

Early morning hunt at the patch at Schuh Farms.

Got one!

Hunkering down on a hayride.

Breaking for some corn.

  

Personal tractor pull through the farm!

Getting tired.

Harvesting caterpillars back at home.

Dad sent us a spooky tree inflatable!

Just too damn cute.

Cue: Theme Song from Jaws

Quotes

I was lying down with Landon during quiet time today and - once again - tried to get him chatting about what he wants to be when he grows up. It's a great conversation starter. Today, though, oh today ...

Me: You're so good with taking care of your doggies. How about a veterinarian? 

L: Well, when I grow bigger, I want to be a daddy. 

Me: That's so sweet, buddy. You'll be a big, strong, happy daddy. Do you want to be a pilot like your daddy?

L: Uuh, no 'cause I think that would make people miss me if I was a pilot. I thiiiink I want to come home and check [on] you guys and no one will miss me. 

I was stunned into a lack of response, obviously feeling verklempt. Landon just recently went through some sort of surge in his pragmatic speech development and conversational skills. It means he says a lot of cute and awesome things these days, but it also opens a window for his thoughts that once were dormant in everyday chit chat. It's an enormous leap to hear him go from his simple comments such as "This truck is blue!" to an insightful comment on our family's current dynamics. 

"Concerning the Lost Aviator"

The skipper of Erik's squadron forwarded along an email that was originally written to the skipper of the USS Carl Vinson this past week after two hornets crashed and the search ended for LT Nate Poloski, presuming him deceased after he could not be located. It was written so well and I thought it was such an amazing note to come from a virtual stranger.

~~~~~

From: Brian Blazevic
Sent: Sunday, September 14, 2014 10:03 PM
To: Raines, Kyle A. LCDR (CVN70)
Subject: Concerning the lost aviator

If there's any way possible, I'd like to get a brief message to the
commanding officer of the USS Carl Vinson. This may not be important in
the grand scheme of things, but it's important to me.

I'm a cab driver for Coronado Cab Company, and me and my co-workers
drive Vinson sailors every time the ship is in port. When we heard about
the loss of the two F18s, and the missing aviator, we talked about it on
the cab stands. We felt bad. One of our drivers has a daughter in the
Marines, and one driver is in the Naval Reserves.

We're just cab drivers, ordinary people living ordinary American lives,
and as such we normally take for granted the safety and security we
have. Those two things, safety and security, are the reason we can
normally be oblivious of world events, and just live our safe little
lives. But, with the loss of a brave pilot, it made us think for a
little while that our cocoon of safety is actually guaranteed by people
who volunteered to make sacrifices on our behalf. Sadly, somebody just
made the ultimate sacrifice -- for us. That means something. The loss
wasn't in vain. It wasn't just a workplace accident. It was a sacrifice
for others. I hope the family and people who knew the lost aviator fully
understand that. If the loss is felt by a taxi driver, I believe it's
felt by a lot of people in America.

The BBC News story paid more attention to the value of the jets, $57
million each, than the lost aviator. We have a budget of -- what? --
$3.9 trillion? No context even for the monetary angle. All of that hurts
because the largest news service on Earth is more interested in the cost
of the machines, with no context, than the person who gave his life for
others. Please remember that not everybody reads headlines at news
sites, shrugs, and moves on. Some of us know the meaning of what
happened. I wanted to read a profile of the aviator, where he's from,
why he decided to serve, and who he left behind -- but I got none of
that.

In Syria and Iraq and many other places in the world today, there are
thousands, probably millions, of refugees because they lack basic
security. They have no homes, no jobs, and are wondering if they will
survive until tomorrow. We don't have those problems here, because of
you. What's that really worth? Everything. I just wish somebody would
explain that to the media and Capitol Hill. I just wished the media
cared enough to tell the real story.

Thanks, everyone on the Vinson, for serving, and know that some ordinary
Americans who don't usually think about "the big picture" are thinking
about it now.

Thanks for serving.

Brian Blazevic
Ordinary American

Taxi driver

The Day I Walked to the Bridge

School started last week for the littles and that, of course, means a few hours for mommy to embrace some solitude. The one morning I dropped them off, I started walking on one of the paved trails popular in Anacortes which runs along the water. 

This is going to sound ultra cheesy and dramatic, but bear with me, please. I had tears in my eyes when my feet set foot on the bridge area of the trail. In the last few years of being these boys' momma, it was an unattainable part of the trail, a couple miles down from my starting point. There was somebody who always wanted out of the stroller or threw a snack overboard, or there was a nap time to keep in mind. I'm sure we could have made it, but it just wasn't a pleasurable experience. My kids have never been stroller bunnies and I never really conditioned them to be, anyways.

So when I breezily crossed the bridge the other day, I found my eyes watering because it was just so damn simple and joyful. 

Hanging on to Summer

Although the unofficial start of Fall has hit the calendar, it is still sunny and 75 here and preschool doesn't start until next week. Soooo that means there are still naked boys running around in the backyard here at the homestead. I sure do love a nice little toddler tush bounding through a sprinkler with giggles; who am I to deny them such boyhood adventures?

Hi.

Evolution of a Mood

As I was sitting in the hallway this evening - standing post by the time out spot to regulate escape efforts of my oldest offspring - I thought I'd take a picture. My plan is to capture a variety of moments in Erik's absence so I can make little videos that share the minor detail and stories that make up our everyday lives while he is away. Sure, I have a billion photos of milestones and cute patootie moments, but I like the real stuff, too. Because, girlfriend, shit is real. Nawmean?

The littlest tush in the house is pretty in tune with moods; very perceptive for a two year old. As he passes by my grumpy self in the hallway this evening, he comes on up and says "Kay, mommy?" with his head perched to the side like an inquiring puppy. Before I can respond, he topples onto me for a squeeze while proclaiming, "Big! Huuuuug!" 

I can't seem to get the positive parenting thing right for both kids on the same day, but one of them will usually pull through with something amazing like that. Thanks, little buddies!

Quotes

[Scene: On a family hike through one of the local trails. I'm trying to engage Landon in the "What do you want to be when you grow up?" conversation and he's not really sure how to answer it. I describe the duties of a park ranger since he likes the woods and hiking so much.]

Me: So maybe you can be a park ranger when you grow up...?

L: Uhh, no. I think I just want to be the guy that just walks in the woods.

I don't think this a funny quote or anything; for some reason it just replayed in my mind for a while. It was such an uncomplicated response and I guess it appealed to a sense of simplicity that I sometimes covet. Wouldn't we all just like to be the one on a walk in the woods with nothing to do? (You'll have to wait for retirement, buddy.)

"A" for Effort

For as much as we prepared for this deployment, I don't know if it made our goodbyes any less emotional. Perhaps less stressful, but no less emotional.

The boys don't know any difference from 10 days to 10 weeks to 10 months so they just think Daddy is gone again for a little bit. I was still crying in the car after we dropped off Erik and Landon said, "It's okay. Stop crying. Is it time for pancakes?" Alas, the thought process of a pint sized human won out. And so I dried my tears and off we went to the breakfast joint to get some pancakes. By the time we were cleaning up our sticky syrup hands, it was time to head home and resume life as normal. 

I will say one of the positives from this experience has been the increased communication and effort that has gone into our marriage and parenting. Erik and I went on more dates than usual this summer to connect, knowing our time was limited. Even the other night when we were slightly annoyed with each other due to underlying exhaustion and inevitable stress, our fingers still found a way to twine together and we held hands as we fell asleep - a tacit apology for short tempers. Admittedly, I can't say that would have happened if it was any old week or any old month. 

Although Navy life can test the patience of a marriage perhaps more than average, it is my belief that it offers more opportunities to strengthen relationships. And here may I present, "A Summer of Selfies"...